Self-regulation

When a child is very young, he or she requires co-regulation. This is where the child relies on a trusted adult for emotional support, and then gradually transitions to their own ability to manage their feelings, thoughts, and behaviours. Self-regulation skills often emerge from the age of 3 years old.

Self regulation refers to the ability to manage our emotions, thoughts and behaviours. When we are experiencing high levels of stress, we can become ‘dysregulated’, meaning we can be unable to manage our emotional responses. This can lead to intense reactions that may appear out of proportion to the situation. Emotional dysregulation is often associated with conditions such as ADHD and Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder (EUPD).

To help promote self regulation, the following activities may prove helpful:

  • mindfulness - tuning into your breath, engaging your senses, noticing your surroundings 

  • exercise - to increase the 'feel good' chemicals in the brain

  • getting a sufficient amount of sleep - this is so important in order to function to the best of our ability. People who have insomnia can find it particularly difficult to self regulate

  • engaging in hobbies

  • spending time in nature - spending time in green spaces have proven benefits in improving mental health 

  • connecting with supportive people 

For more challenging situations, strategies like deep breathing, box breathing or hand/5 finger breathing can be helpful 

What are the activities that help you or the children you support to self-regulate?

It can be helpful to put together a list of top 3 tips to reduce stress, which you can check in with during times when you are experience high levels of stress.

This image shows an example of some lego sorting. This was carried out by an adult client who was feeling particularly overwhelmed and very unsure of what to engage with during a session. After suggesting sorting lego into colours, the client began to do so and by the end of the session, they were feeling much calmer. The lego sorting helped to achieve a sense of calmness and clarity, helping the client to self-regulate.

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Creativity during school holidays